Download Sources
Device Configuration
Split APKs Installation Guide
Some apps are distributed as Split APKs (multiple .apk files packaged together) to optimize resources. Standard Android installers cannot open them.
About This App
Pilfer from pirates, conspire with cardinals and perform miracles with an incompetent magician. The Procession to Calvary is a Pythonesque adventure game made from Renaissance paintings, and a spiritual successor to the critically acclaimed Four Last Things.
Huzzah! The holy war is over! Your oppressors have been vanquished, the churches of the Old God lay in ruin and thousands of innocent people have been murdered! But it's not all good news; the tyrant Heavenly Peter has escaped your clutches, and you have been tasked with the mission of finding him...
Your journey will take you through a richly detailed landscape built from hundreds of different Renaissance paintings. You will steal a ship, feed a donkey, compete in a talent contest, assist an inept street magician, sing, dance, play the (magic?) flute, poke a man's face, hunt for treasure and have a chat with Our Lord God Almighty... But will you find Heavenly Peter? And if you do, how will you take your revenge!?
Features:
Pointing and Clicking – A traditional point and click interface, with a 'verb coin' interaction menu and a simple inventory from which you can drag and drop your preciously hoarded items.
Renaissance Artwork – Paintings by Rembrandt, Botticelli, Michelangelo and many more are brought together into one consistent world, in a way that is also as sympathetic as possible to the original works.
Classical Music – a soundtrack selected to fit with the style of the artwork. Music from classical composers such as Vivaldi, Bach and George Frideric Handel will accompany you on your journey.
Standalone Story - The Procession to Calvary is set in the same world as Four Last Things, but it's story can be played independently.
Optional Murder – You will be equipped with a sword. This will become useful in a number of different situation, but you will be strongly discouraged from using it on people. Ignoring this advice - and murdering anyone who stands in your way – will serve as a useful method of skipping any puzzles you don't like. But be warned; your actions might come back to haunt you...
Nonsense – Surreal, anarchic comedy. Lofty subject matter is treated with refreshing flippancy. Gags about butts are taken very seriously. But rest assured, while some of the jokes may be ridiculous, the puzzles make perfect sense! (or at least adhere to a consistent internal logic)
Moments of Surprising Profundity – Actually, no... Don't read too much into it.
User Reviews
The environment and humour are excellent. The idea is also every clever, and the interactions are witty and entertaining. I thoroughly enjoyed the game, and only have a couple of criticisms. The game is a bit short, for the price. Also, the routes out of certain scenes are not always very obvious and a couple of times I thought I was stuck until I happened to randomly tap somewhere that made the game continue. Otherwise, a fantastic game that I really enjoyed.
Great good ole fashion point and click game, not like the endless escape games that call their selves point and click. Very funny too. Only thing I can think of to do better would be a way to automatically go between areas without having to constantly walk back and forth.
I agree with other reviews saying it's too short the price but I didn't subtract any stars bc this game was hilariously written and the usage of medieval art for the graphics was an awesome idea. I really enjoyed this game.
No sound. Game was fun even without sound, but classical music was one of the selling points. Would give higher rating if the sound issue is fixed.
How to Download The Procession to Calvary APK
- Enter the package name
com.JoeRichardson.TheProcessionToCalvaryon the APK Downloader. - Select your device architecture (ARM64 recommended for modern devices).
- Click Download to get the merged APK file.
- Transfer and install the APK on your Android device.
- Keep Updated: Visit APKDER.COM regularly to search for and download the latest secure versions of your favorite apps.
Security & Signature Verification
This APK download is 100% safe. We verify that the cryptographic signature of the file matches the official developer credentials. No modifications or adware are injected.
